Some keywords are born and come into vogue as a reflection of the times. Sometime in the 2000s, I remember the “well-being” era. The phrase “green light” came into vogue in the context of social changes that made it more comfortable to discuss gender and sexuality issues in the public sphere. In the era of tightening livelihoods, we saw the rise of “Hell-Joseon” and the rise of new words for new kinds of lifestyles, such as “YOLO”, which is a word for a new kind of lifestyle that cannot withstand “Hell-Joseon”. In the era of cryptocurrencies and corona-induced liquidity parties, words like “FIRE people” and “Financial Freedom” were thrown around.

When I was looking for another word to describe the current times, “손절”(Stop loss, cut off) came to mind. A stop loss means that you originally bought the stock, but the price has fallen and you sell it at a loss. But for some reason, it seems to have come to mean cutting off a relationship. It’s scary when you think about it.

Cut off friends, cut off girlfriends, cut off parents

I’ve often come across people’s problems online. “I lent money to a friend and I’m not getting it back”, “I found a photo of my boyfriend’s ex-girlfriend on his phone”, “my soon-to-be father-in-law has been acting inappropriately”, and so on. The consensus of the comments is to cut off.

Just cut off. I’m glad you realised this early on. There’s no point in stressing over a relationship like that. Cut off.

Times seems to be changing. The level of morality, character, and common sense required of each person has all been levelled upwards, and if you’re found to be flawed, you’re out. It doesn’t matter if it’s a public figure on TV, an anonymous person across a LAN, or a friend of 20 years, there is no room for understanding. And so we gradually began to feel awkward about giving away our side.

If I’m bitter about these changes, am I becoming the old person? We all make mistakes and say stupid things. Intentsions and sincerity get twisted by circumstances. But I wondered if a relationship that is ripe enough can transcend mistakes and misunderstanding.

I don’t know if what’s unacceptable to us is really unacceptable, or if it’s the kind of thing that is understandable in a generous sense.